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Ten Top Tips when going through a divorce

Ten Top Tips when going through a divorce

Divorce can be a traumatic and stressful time for the whole family. However, it can be made easier by following some practical advice. Here are our ten top tips for anyone who is going through a divorce:

  1. Take specialist legal advice as soon as possible. There is a lot of useful information on the internet, but family and financial circumstances can vary drastically. You should not assume that you will find all of the answers to your own case online. You should obtain bespoke advice, tailored to you and your family's needs.
  2. Do not sign any documents presented to you by your husband or wife without seeking specialist legal advice.
  3. Avoid involving your children in the dispute at all costs. If possible, try keep a united front and to shelter them, rather than encouraging them to "choose sides".
  4. Do not post anything about your divorce on social media. Posts like this are frequently printed off and used as evidence in court for family disputes. It is often advisable to shut down your social media accounts until after your case is concluded, or at least avoid saying anything about your families circumstances.
  5. Change your passwords for all of your online accounts such as emails, social media, online banking and other online accounts which could be useful to your ex if they obtain access.
  6. Don't believe everything your ex tells you, nothing is 'worthless'. For example, we often hear from clients that their ex has told them that their pension is "worthless." However, it might be the case that it is worth hundreds of thousands of pounds, and they simply do not want you to start making enquiries about that.
  7. Avoid sending your ex written communications in texts or emails about your divorce. Again, these are all too often printed out or forwarded to solicitors, to be used as evidence.
  8. If your ex has done something to upset or annoy you, try to talk things through with a close friend or family member before phoning your solicitor, as this could save you in legal fees. It is better to use the time with your solicitor effectively by speaking to them when you are feeling calm and in a position to fully absorb their advice.
  9. Be aware that banks can freeze any joint accounts when they become aware that a couple have separated. This can sometimes cause practical problems, especially where monthly direct debits are due to come off.
    Sometimes, it might be in your interests to have an account frozen, especially if your ex is frivolously taking out money without your agreement. However, remember that the bank will usually need a signature from both of you to authorise re-opening the account.
  10. Regardless of how much progress you feel you have made in your case, do not fix a date for a subsequent wedding until your divorce is granted. This may sound obvious, however you would be surprised at how often this happens.

At Thorntons, we have an experienced Family Law team. If you have any questions about separation or divorce please contact us on 03330 430150.

About the authors

Mhairi McAulay
Mhairi McAulay

Mhairi McAulay

Trainee Solicitor

Personal Injury

Lucy Metcalf
Lucy Metcalf

Lucy Metcalf



For more information, contact Mhairi McAulay or any member of the Personal Injury team on +44 1334 800228.